"Even with our eyes open we often go through our life asleep.  We dream of what yesterday was or what tomorrow will be, all the while missing out on the opportunities to create tremendous joy and breakthroughs right this moment."

I've not written in a while.....  happily, I can say that my business has started to take off and I am enjoying coaching leaders and physicians in being the best leaders they can be.

As I reflect on the flash that this year seems to have been, and as I deal with a family health crisis, I am reminded of the fragility of life, and the preciousness of the present moment.  How easy it is to obsess about the past, or worry about the future, yet miss what's right in front of us!  For the past few weeks, I have thought of the real possibility of losing my husband to a life disabling or life-ending illness. As we take one day at a time and proceed with life-saving treatment, I marvel at how I've lived more in the present recently, than I ever have.  At a recent Center for Spiritual Living service, I heard that worry is "negative prayer."  That we have to believe and "know" on a deep level, and act "as if" what we really want in the world is a "done deal."  I must admit that, like meditating, making that belief a habit is easier said than done.

I've started to journal again and find great relief in putting my thoughts down on paper.  My fears seem a bit less scary when I get them out of my head and in to my never judging, always accepting journal.  For some reason today, I decided not to turn on music, and just listened to the pouring rain outside, and the noise of my husband's movement around the house in the background.  The rain finally slowed down and I was aware that, if the music had been playing, I wouldn't still hear the patter of the raindrops against the window and pavement, nor would I hear that ever comforting sound of my husband's presence.

I can't say that I've totally embraced and welcomed this journey of dealing with my husband's illness, yet I am seeing the gifts that the journey is providing, and am grateful for those.  And, in changing my view, I know that the universe will provide a world of possibilities!

If you've traveled a similar path, I welcome your comments and insights!